YES AND....Curiosity rewarded

I have recently been teaching two very different levels of improv classes- Level 1 with beginners, and a more advanced class to more experienced improvisers. It is interesting to see the differences in the players’ approach to collaboration.

Newer players have just learnt that the golden rule (although there are no REAL rules in improv) is to say YES AND to your partner. In other words, be in agreement and accept the reality of the offers from your partner in a scene and then add information to it.

For example:
Player A: Hey sis, I thought you were going to work today…
Player B: I was, but I realised today is a special day.
Player A: Wow you remembered?
Player B: Of course I did, I would never forget the 1st anniversary of your divorce, I know how much it means to you!
Player A: You are the best! YES a year of freedom! Whoo Hoo!
Player B: YES!!!! Let’s celebrate!

There is a famous saying in improv (and I am afraid I am not sure who first said it) that says “Don’t build me a whole Cathedral, just pass me a brick and I will pass you one, and we will build this thing together”. This speaks to true collaboration. The above example is a great example of how just saying yes (not always literally) to the other person’s ideas can take you to all sorts of new places and possibilities!
I bet you didn’t expect it was divorce anniversary! And I am sure Player A and B didn’t expect it either.

This is what I love about improv. No matter how dumb the idea may sound, it is our job to ‘yes and’ it and make it work. But notice how each player didn’t overdo the information. They just said yes to the other person (accepted what they had just said was the truth) and added some more context or information.

It is a joy to watch 2 people riffing and making it up on the spot when they are in the ‘yes and’ zone like this. However sometimes the scene can play out very differently when there is no YES AND agreement.

For example:
Player A: Hey sis, I thought you were going to work today…
Player B: What are you talking about? I don’t have a job!
Player A: Oh…. you quit?
Player B: No, I’ve never worked. You know that.

At first this may sound funny but it is really hard to keep a scene like this going as there is so much disagreement about simple realities. YES AND moves a story forward and gets the players into a good rhythm, which is what you need especially if you are doing a 100% improvised 1hr play for example!

I see this often in newer improvisers before they really take YES AND on board. But why? Why do we go for the NO BUT rather than the YES AND?

One word- CONTROL.

We want to control the direction of the story or we don’t want any surprises we can’t talk ourselves out of, or we think we have a better idea. All control is about safety. The improviser stops the ‘yes and’ to stop the action and to stop it moving forward because what if it goes somewhere I don’t want to go? What if it gets chaotic or out of control? What if I look stupid?

What if indeed?

I have said this before and I will say it again- a need to control comes from a need for safety and a need for safety comes from a feeling of fear and the opposite to fear is………DRUM ROLL……………….

CURIOSITY!

That’s right! When we can stay curious in a scene (and in life) possibility opens up not shuts down. Controlling things shuts down possibilities. Being curious and saying YES AND opens us up to surprises!
And yes that can be scary but that can also be exciting, empowering, invigorating and meaningful!

One of my clients learnt about the YES AND principle and noticed that when she did it more in everyday conversations at work and in relationships, people opened up more and in turn said YES AND back to her more often. She says her conversations have been much more interesting and fun!

More experienced players in improv know the joy of saying YES AND even to things that seem dumb or even negative.
They don’t deny the created reality.
They accept it, add to it, and move forward in curiosity and they are rewarded with better, more interesting and often much more funny scenes.

True collaboration comes when we can let go of control, get curious and say YES AND!

Try it even just for an hour today! YES AND……



If you want to learn more about how to YES AND why not sign up for a class or 1:1 coaching? Coaching